Introduction - In My Eyes

One thing that I’ve learned thus far is to have faith that each relationship has its own direction.  When I honestly believed this, my vision became more flexible as to my destiny, and my life began to align cohesively.  Yet, often, a voice from within told me, “This is not the place for you right now.”  One of the biggest obstacles I ran into at these times was figuring out what to do when I heard this “voice.”

Many times, I felt the voice of other people doubting my change in direction.  But it was my choice to listen to this inner voice, even if my direction seemed not to be “socially acceptable.”  Sometimes, I wondered what “socially acceptable” really means.  Does it mean being accepted by others or just trying to decrease one’s chances of being alone?  So, maybe not being “socially acceptable” was a fear of mine that prevented me from making the right choices for myself.

    One change in direction I made was stepping away from my carpentry business.  Day in and day out, I was in homes where I sensed an imbalance.  This was not in the cosmetic set up of these homes but in the core of why this home was started in the first place and how it was currently functioning.  Usually, a home starts with a relationship.  In some of these homes, people turned to me and talked.  I listened, and often in the days to come, I saw the influence and positive effect of my word.  The more and more I saw this, the more I began to question the choice of my craft.  I’d ask myself, “Shall I continue to build shelves, or do I try to build hope?”  I recognized that I had some talent and power in both options, and I needed to make a responsible choice with what I naturally possessed. 

    I often felt joy when I was helping others with the construction of their homes, but I felt a greater need in higher demand of my skills and in the minds, bodies, and spirits of the individuals inside of these homes.  I also realized that it was my own home (self) that needed to be worked on, so I could be in a position to strengthen my abilities for helping others.  I began to see how integrating and balancing my need to help others with helping ourselves is one of hardest choices we all seem to face.  Many times, the fear of not being accepted socially interrupts our ability to make the choices we feel will bring more happiness to others, as well as ourselves.

    I must admit that I have made some poor choices in the past, but there was something I learned from these life tests.  I have come to realize that “acceptance” will no longer hinder my path.  More importantly, I will feel grateful and blessed to have an opportunity to challenge myself, grow, and help others.  As long as “in my eyes” my choice was made with the purest motivation, it was the right choice.  So now I just tell myself that...

…

I might fall,

and I might rise

in others eyes,

but in my own,

I shall never be alone.